A no sleep night ,and a Wonky Tree ....................

Soo
I went to bed or should i say went to the sofa! I' m sleeping on my lovely comfy sofa as i find the queen bed too big
!  strange but true ,I get like this after hospital ,



I  did last time too ,the bedroom just seems too big(and it's not) and lonely i guess ,i have the television on all the time too where as normaly i don't . I'm wide awake and really don't think i will sleep at all, gosh i can't wait to come off these meds . Oh and I'm a bit excited too ,I've just watched Kirsties Xmas and she ,bless her , got me all motivated to start decorating the house ,it's only taken a week!  ,plus I  bought a cute wee decoration at the garden centre today, to go along with the my gorgeous St Nick ! I call hi m St Nick rather than Santa as he is just so old fashioned looking  , a round jolly St Nick .
Isn't he  just beautiful ! and I'm having a lot of white /silver this year ,I seem to have become rather obsessed with white since
I  developed the OCD ,yes I have this now, but I've been told its quite normal too ,one of the symptoms from the meds and residual from the tumour and the swelling on my brain . Gosh it was hard to write that ,as I don't really like to talk about it .Mind you , the house has never been so clean and I've discovered (apart from the earlier weeks chaoticness) I'm actually quite organised  or more so (an understatement there, I'm, OVER. THE. TOP . organised!).   Anyway it's about decorating ,this post , I will stay on track I promise ! . I need to straighten out the tree branches and FIX the tree
( oh child of mine),and have a  last look at the decorations ,I threw out all the old and tired ones ,apart from a couple  that I 've kept of the children's , I just can't bear to part with  (as us Mum's do!)  Oh  yes White ,  I have white potted plants ie  petunias and impatients with alyssum , I will show them when all the outside is done . I need to replace my outside lights as they have decided not to work this year .  If I could import some snow, I tell you I would be in heaven !  all you gorgeous English ladies I'm jealous!  A lovely girlfriend if mine is in Enland for a few months and she makes me envious with her  updates of all the tradititions she is partaking in,   she describes every thing so deligthfully though so I forgive her!   Kirsties Home made home  is on again so even more motivation he he ,she is doing some amazing things ,and all quite simple too. oh and gold ,can't remember if silver and gold is okay ? but with the white to break  it should be okay? ,I' ve lain some side by side and it looks okay ,but i really don't care as its what i want ,and anything goes doesnt' it  ,? I dont want too much red  where in the past it would have been everywhere ,red is a bit too  much for me now ,too fiery and bold ,it hurts to look at it too long ,although ST Nick is okay but he's cute. I've just tried to fix the tree and that didn't work ,now I have to find a thin rod or something ,don't you just love children who play with the tree and break it??it !!!!!!!! Well now I've lost the tape ,I shoved a pencil in the tube bit and that broke!,,,well o fcourse it would! honestly the things  I think will work!!  it seemed a good idea at the time and that's all I;m going to say about that! I tell you If you could see me sometimes!!! .  and no its not pity i'm after its laughter ,cos it really is funny when you recognise idiosyncrasies(sp)  about your self it's actually very very telling! I  know what my mother meant about me now ! when i was a child ,you were right mother!   i think  I 'll just buy a new tree!  except i wont cos this is only the second year of this one !!!! I would have had a real one but don't think i could stand the mess.  Well now what? ,Id better find the tape and I'll pop back later with more tales of 'Kimmy and the
Wonky Tree.' to be contd!