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Tuesday, 13 December 2011

Sooo 'I ll be skinny again then ?'

I stop taking the dexamethasone today yay !  although I am a wee (undersatement ) bit apprehensive ,this steroid changed and saved my life in more ways than one ,  It enabled me to live life again symptom free before the op and aid  so much after . The down side has been the weight gain and feelings of anger and agressiveness  ,but the upside has been my cooking !!!! look out Nigella  and Jamie  ,I  discovered taste again and its  been a few weeks of  almost  gourmet  meals ! not expensive but full of flavours and fresh veges  and lots and lots of peanut butter on toast
! ..Oh how I will miss you !   lashings  and lashings of peanut butter ,it was a sight  that had to be seen to be believed!!!! 

Crashed the BB yesterday ,poor T had to explain it all  to the tech on the phone as I knew I wouldn't be able to ,  he is so good and he spent an hour with them following their  instruction with me being a right pain in the background , yelling out suggestions and weell being ignored really ,I'm sure he and the tech were rolling their eyes at me and wishing I'd disappear so they could just get on with fixing the problem . I do worry I put too much pressure on him ,with my moods and OCD  , He has watched his Mum change so much and its so confusing for him at imes ,  I do wonder, if its a ,   form of ,  dare I say it  emotional abuse?  I would appreciate some opinion from other Mum's and Dads on this,  any comments would help ,it can be done anonomously (sp) . when your world changes so dramtically ,your  view can get so warped ,,I need   a reality check again '








 So we re arranged and decluttered and decorated  yesterday in the lounge .  I'm still not that happy with the  furniture  placement ,but that more to do wih the way the room is set out I  think ,but hey don't forget this is me talking !    please excuse again the poor quality of  some  ,but you'll get the general idea .  The book stacks are just thrown there really ,I can't live without books around me so still need to do those in a better arrangement ,tree's still not finished ,but she looks good in the corner .