oops ,sent that too soon!!!

he ehe there i go ,finger and thumbs!!!!!!    heres my mornig pics of my roses ,

well that sme for the day,im tired tonign so hoefull of a good sleep1 ,have shopping to do tomorrow ,which takes a lot out of me ,a bit of sensory overload i think! hope im all fixed up for xmas shopping or there could be a few strange gifts!!!!!!!

me! ,a big mess , and where am i going to put it?

well finaly i will say hello!  i dont like(the foto)   much lol but as im not my best at the mo,and i took soooo many of them ,this will hav to do !!! ugh! i hav piled on the weight cos of the drugs im on (cancer drug),honestly i cant stop eating! it terribl.e !   ive gained over a stone prob more in the last 3 weeks . lovley having an appetite tho again (i think ! lol)    and my eye looks weird ,must ask if its the tumour ,guess it may be , weird how u think u look one way and in realitiy you dont .!  any way that me ,now u hava face to the name ,very brave of me huh ,but hey ,life has changed ,ive changed ,so im goin with it !!    

only a week 2 day til the op ,it took me a whole day 2 work out how long a week is! my perception of time has gone all awry  ,it still seems on one hand a long way off ,and on the other not! .i keep looking at the date and then the day, to get it to sink in!    mixed feeling allthe time ,beause im living in a differnt sort of normal  ,it shard to work out what is normal.  I know who i am ,i have the same though and feeling i think but i do feell so different at times.sigh it s hard to explain too!  , i was now ,I  no living life very hard ,everything had go sooo difficalt ....frm what was happenign in  to me , to what to eat, i had so much clutter in my head and around me ,i coulnt orgainis e things properly, the house was clean,and had soem sense  of order but it all felt strange ,little things annoyed me ect this was over a period of 5 mayb 6 weeks ,coudl be more...ive forgotten .......     any way that me in a glimpse ,a lsice of my my crazy at times other world!

so my day ,easy to show u in picures ,and plse exuse the shambles ,luck i can shut the doo to the garage or i tell you it would do my head in if i had to look at it !!!

so see !!!  sigh!  oh i have done a bit of a tidy since ,but hardly made a .dent!! ! 

                      see where im at tommrow huh!!!!!   as it seems to take me ages to do Stuff ,like whle hous go passed and ime still pottering with sonelthing small!   did my hall table ,well that must hav taken an hour and i only shifted some flowers!